My inspiration, colleague and friend Gilda out in San Diego (and what I wouldn't give to spirit her over to a house next door to me!) makes an interesting suggestion about how to cost out what it is you are actually spending.
I was musing that it would be cheating to bring my laundry over to my own house to get it done, but maybe not if I took it to my son's house, since he lives at about the same level I'll be living when I move to the West End.
Gilda makes the point that all those kinds of barters should be figured in as "in-kind" costs, giving me a much clearer picture of how high on the food chain I'm actually living. If I don't pay for my own washer and dryer and electricity or gas to run them, then lower on the ladder is simply washing everything by hand. If I barter or in the case of Raf, just show up at his door because I'm his mother...then the cost of those appliances is still there, somebody else is donating that to me-- in this case, the Association of Retarded Citizens of High Point, which provides the subsidy so Raf can afford his housing.
When you run a nonprofit, many grants from foundations and the government require some sort of "matching" amount, much of which can be provided in "in-kind" donations. Sweat equity, for instance.
Gilda says that when I go visit my "real" house on the weekends, that should be considered an in-kind cost, since somebody has to pay that rent and utilities.
I told Gilda that I know she's absolutely correct, but there is a deep laziness in my bones that balks at all that accounting. I need a bean counter at my elbow, a volunteer accountant. But wait! That would be an in-kind expense as well!
If you want to do this "right" (i.e. really see how much it costs to live at whatever standard of living you intend to over the next few months) then you should do some of this bean counting that Gilda is advocating. Otherwise, it's easy to sneak in all sorts of "extras" that a permanent resident in the West End living on $800 a month wouldn't have access to.
These extras might include the things you've already mentioned (use of someone else's washer, using your house on weekends: lodging, meals, electricity, heat, water, computer, etc that are all paid for by JF's salary rather than your $800.)
To avoid constant bean counting, I would anticipate the most likely of these and pre-assign them a cost. Take a look at what you normally spend on food in a week or a month, for example, and divide by the number of meals you get from it. That gives you an "average" at home meal cost. Look at your electric and water bills and calculate a daily amount, then divide it by two, since both you and JF will presumably be there. Don't forget things like your mortgage payment, your house and car insurance, internet provider, cable service, mileage cost on the family car - basically each of your household bills. Get a daily cost for each. This is an interesting exercise for anyone - how much does it really cost each of us to live each day?
Eventually, you'll come up with a total "day-away-from-apartment-at-home" cost. It might be more than you think, such as $45 a day. THAT is your real subsidy if you spend time at home. But you only need to calculate it once - not every time you spend a day. And if you decide to barter for some of it, it also gives you real figures to work with. Might actually be fun, and I'm sure you'd learn a lot.
Posted by: Judy | August 01, 2008 at 09:40 AM